And you say you’re in love

Young woman embracing man holding beer bottle, smiling

So the Valentine’s Day has finally come to an end. Hmm…who would have thought it would ever end? Lol… at least now media houses are off to find fresh news that have got nothing to do with love or so I think. For now, I know the love bug that had bitten plenty people last week has started migrating to only-God-knows-where to await the next season. As for having fun, I’m pretty sure most people had fun that day. If you didn’t, don’t worry, there will always be another chance.

Still on the love bug and all who have been bitten or smitten (it’s still the month of love so I’m allowed to talk about it as much as I want, right?), I’m really curious about the Valentine’s day stories. Haven’t heard too many but there are the usual. I’ve heard things like “his number was not available all through the day and he claims his battery was flat” or “I still wonder if he loves me or he’s just leading me on” or “what if I’m not the only one?” I’m no expert on relationships but one thing I know is that if you have to wonder if someone really loves you then maybe you already know the answer to that.

Think about it this way. True love like a light cannot be hidden. It is like an incandescent light that needs no source of energy to shine. All the energy it needs are within. Nobody has ever been able to truly give an accurate definition of love. In fact, we’d rather say that God is love and since we’re not God then we can never truly love. Okay, maybe we humans only know how to express the kind of love that depends on conditions or feelings but I know one thing for sure. There’s a manual that tells us what love is and what love is not. Have you ever read that manual? Before you go cracking your pretty brain, trying to decipher whether his words are true or not, here’s what you should know about love.

Love has a personality. He has a face, a name an attitude and an expression. Love is a patient and kind person. Love looks honest and tells the truth at all times. Love can go the distance or walk a thousand miles to prove himself. Love is hopeful. It will take a great deal of effort to make love lose faith in times of trouble. Love is enduring and doesn’t act out in anger even when he is provoked. You know who love isn’t? Love is not that man that is murderously jealous or boastful. He is not too proud to apologize when he does something wrong and he is not rude. He is not selfish and doesn’t insist on having his way all the time. Love is not irritable but is understanding. Love does not keep a grudge. He is quick to forget things you did that hurt him (I’m still learning that one). He doesn’t rejoice when other people hit bad times and above all, never loses faith in you, the one he loves.

…And you say you are in love. Let’s live love and let’s learn to recognize love when we find it. You want to know more about love? Check out 1 Corinthians 13.

So, the Valentine’s day is over but let’s live, give and be love.

Keep being complete…

Femmetotale

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Last first date – Blind Date Gone Bad

Young couple in cafe

It’s happened to the best of us. It’s happened to me too. Any girl in the dating zone will tell you she’s been on one or two blind dates in her life. Wondering what I mean by blind date? Don’t worry I’ve been there before too. I remember hearing about a blind date and wondering if she went on a date with a blind guy. Awwww… touching! I also remember thinking, so we still have girls with hearts of gold like that… Well, I soon found out that a blind date is not about going on a date with someone that can’t see but simply going a date with someone you’ve never met in person.

We’ve heard fairytales about two strangers that went on a ‘blind date’, fell in love and lived happily ever after. Some say it was love at first sight, some say they hit it right off when they met and some say they knew they’d be perfect together the moment they met. With facebook and other social media, blind dates have practically become a normal thing cos who’s to tell if the guy you’ve been chatting with on facebook is really the one in his profile picture? So many classic romantic tales have been spurn around ‘blind dates’ and everybody loves a little bit of romance, right? Okay, so imagine my delight when my dear friend, Victoria told me about her blind date who just came into the country and couldn’t wait to meet her. What could be more romantic than that? Well, let’s find out how the date went right from her. I’m trying not to spill the gist myself 😀 My own words are in brackets. Enjoy!

He just got back into Nigeria and had climbed seven mountains to get my number from my friend. So I felt what’s the worst thing that could happen, abi? I had heard tales of how handsome and  funny he was (two points for him already) so I was kind of looking forward to our meeting.

I met him at the hotel he was staying and we proceeded to an eatery not far from there. We chatted for a little while and then ordered. He ordered for oha soup and eba, I think I ordered for rice I’m not so sure now. He didn’t do anything yucky like talk with his mouth full or anything. (Okay, this is the part I really dread! What’s with guys and talking with their mouths full? One point for him, sweetz…he’s passed this part!)

What made me write this piece was what he did after. He washed his hands in the bowl, then put some water in his mouth and rinsed it. I mean gurgled the water like you would when brushing your teeth, with his face up and everything. (What!!! :O Did you say gurgled? I withdraw my one point!) Hmmm… wait, there’s more. He used the water to wipe his lips then shook his hands to dry the water off. Finally he took the serviette to complete what he had started. I just sat there, looking at him. (Sorry, sweetz, where did you say that guy came back from, the desert?) 

I didn’t know what to do really, thinking back now I hope I wasn’t staring. I was too embarrassed to check if other people had witnessed what I just saw. Of course, I had to suffer through it all till he got the bill. The amazing thing is, he didn’t even know what he did was a big ‘no no’. I thought it was over until the bill came. Ladies, he asked the waiter to wait while he crosschecked the bill with her, making sure no naira was lost. At the end of it there was an overshoot of about N40 or so, which he demanded for of course. And no, he did not tip the waiter. (hahahahaha…he had to make sure the waiter wasn’t stealing him blind. You’ve got to hand it to the guy naaa….he was being financially prudent.)

-Victoria

Blind date….hmmmm…I guess sometimes you’ve got to just have faith and take a blind leap. Thanks for sharing with us, Victoria. You sure made me have a good laugh this morning. 

Femmetotale

 

PS: Last First Date is still up! Remember you can share your own bizarre dating experience with us. Just send a mail to alicia_davids@yahoo.com

To Fan an Old Flame IV

Sorry femmes, I know it’s been a while but here’s the next edition of To Fan an Old Flame. I know you’re eager to know what happened next. How did Christie treat Frank in the past? Did Frank recognize Christie and did they become friends again? Find out in this next part. Meanwhile, if you missed the first 3 parts then click to read Part I, Part II and Part III.

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Continued from last edition…..

She laughed softly under her breath and Frank asked her what amused her so. “Nothing much, I just remembered something that happened last night.” Christie shook her head slightly and giggled again. Then she realized that they were approaching the hall for the event. She knew she had to say something quickly and get rid of him. She was grateful for his help but she was already tired of his silence.

“This is where we’re holding the dinner tonight.”

She expected him to walk away but he stood there nervously, like he had something he really wanted to say.

“My name is Frank Daniel Kenechukwu. I’m a 300 Level student of Statistics.” He said.

Christie rolled her eyes. Did he really have to pronounce his full name like that. He was obviously a boring guy and Christie was seconds away from yawning. She checked herself in time. Her friend, Muna had told her the day before that she was too rude to guys. “I’m Cristabel Eze. 2nd year Marketing. Everybody calls me Christie.” She decided to toe his bee line.

Frank was silent for a while. Christie decided to break the silence again. “F.D.K,” She said.

“What did you say?” Frank asked.

“I said, F.D.K. Those are your initials, right?”

“Yes.” Frank laughed silently. He seemed to be thinking. “I’ve never thought about it that way.”

“Well, that’s a new thing then.” Christie shrugged. There was something cute about his bashfulness. Maybe she could be friends with him. After all, there were so many more assignments left to be done before they graduated. She smiled to herself at that mischievous thought.

They were in front of Abubakar Hall when Christie said, “Do you want to attend the dinner? Actually the IV is sold for N100 and N150 for two persons. It is for a complete meal.”

“Really? It is very cheap. What kind of meal is that?” Frank looked suspicious.

Christie laughed casually. She had had to answer that question a number of times. “It is for a whole meal and you have two options of; rice with moi moi and chicken, including fruit salad and a drink or eba and egusi soup with fish. It has been subsidized by my fellowship. The idea is to get people to attend the dinner and also deliver the word of God to them. You gain both ways.” For some reason, Christie hoped he would turn down the invitation.

“In that case, I would love to attend. Do I need to dress formally? Do you have any date or can I get tickets for both of us?”

Christie was surprised. She hadn’t expected him to be interested and she hadn’t thought about being anybody’s date to the dinner. “Yes, the dress code is formal. A shirt and trouser would do for you. I don’t think I’ll be needing a date since I’m part of the organizers.”

His face fell. “It wouldn’t be fun for me to go there alone.”

For some reason, Christie felt like cheering him up. She didn’t know how to turn someone who had been of much help to her that night down. “Okay, I’ll try as much as I can to squeeze out time to sit with you if you attend.”

Frank smiled like a toddler, “Thank you, Christie, let me go and get ready.” He walked away quickly.

Christie walked into the hall. Satisfied that everything had been prepared the way she wanted, she went to her hostel, quickly changed into a formal purple dress with sequined detail on the neckline. She admired her look of simplicity with a touch of class. Then she went back to the hall.

The hall was already quite full. She had expected a large turn up but she never imagined it that way. She soon spotted Frank in a tuxedo. Christie was surprised. She hadn’t expected him to take it so seriously. She walked over to him. He looked as if he was ready to bolt from the room any minute. Christie smiled warmly at him, “You’re welcome. I didn’t know you would make it.”

“Am I okay in this?” Frank adjusted his slightly over-sized jacket.

Christie had always be known to be blunt, “You shouldn’t have bothered dressing up so much. A shirt and trouser would have been just fine.”

Frank blushed so much that his pimples even looked purple.

Christie laughed and bumped his shoulders playfully to ease the tension “Relax, you look okay.” He seemed to relax a bit and even smiled.

The rest of the evening went smoothly. Everything went according to plan. Well, everything except for one of the guest artistes who didn’t show up. The story was that her car had broken down on the way so she and her crew were unable to make it to the dinner. It wasn’t much of a setback. The rest of the event went so well that the Head Pastor even called Christie and commended her for a job well done. She beamed with smiles as she walked back to meet Frank who was waiting patiently for her. She had managed to shuttle effectively between Frank’s table and organizing the event.

After that night, Frank became a regular figure by her side. He visited her so often that he was often referred to as one of her roommates. He helped her out with class work as much as he could even though they weren’t even course mates. Christie heard from a reliable source in his class that he was a candidate for a first class degree in Statistics. Frank eventually asked Christie to be his girlfriend a couple of months after they started seeing each other. She turned down his offer. He just wasn’t her type. Muna had told her to give Frank a chance. He seemed like a nice guy. Christie couldn’t get past the pimples on his face or his tall, gangly frame.

That was seven years ago. The Frank standing behind that powerful desk wasn’t the same Frank she used to know. This Frank wasn’t skinny and had no single pimple or spot on his face. He didn’t stutter when he spoke. He wasn’t wearing ridiculous white-rimmed glasses, instead he had on a very cute pair of black Chanel glasses. He didn’t look nervous or unsure of himself. He was well built and was wearing a starched sky-blue shirt with a patterned navy blue tie over well cut trousers.

“Oh my God! Frank, what a surprise!’ Christie said and walked closer to the table.

He extended his hand and smiled coolly. “Hello Christie, what a pleasant surprise too. What are you doing in my office?”

To be continued….

Femmetotale

Watch out for the next part of To Fan an Old Flame. You’re sure going to love it! 🙂

To Fan an Old Flame III

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Sorry femmes, I know this part has taken quite a while. I hope you’ll forgive me though after you read the end **winks*.

….continued from last edition

“Are you having problems with your computer?” someone beside her said. His voice had a soft, boyish tone and he was peeking at her from behind white-rimmed eye glasses. Christie nodded reluctantly, wondering what this boy with a face covered with reddish acne could do to help her.

“Try restarting the system. It is probably frozen,” he said.

Christie wondered why she hadn’t thought about that earlier. She thanked him and reached down to find the power off button. She almost felt embarrassed when she couldn’t find it and was about to tell him that when Frank reached across her legs and switched off the system manually.

Shortly after that he restarted the computer and within moments it was working properly. Christie said a very grateful thank you to him and started browsing the internet. She wondered if that slight smile on his face was him blushing or if he was just happy he could fix the problem. She ran into another hitch within a few minutes. She couldn’t find any document on Google search related to the topic she was doing the assignment on. Frank quickly came to her rescue again, even drawing up his chair closer to her screen. He assured her that he was very good at finding stuff on the internet and got right to it. Within a few minutes he had found five documents that were closely related to her assignment and she did the assignment quickly. Christie was all smiles as she thanked him. Again, there was that shy smile on his face.

Having found what she came for, Christie pulled her seat back and made to leave. Frank nearly fell off his seat as he stood up at the same time. He blushed, “Are you ready to leave?” Christie would have wanted to roll her eyes and say something sarcastic but she held her tongue and said yes. She had to be nice to someone that just saved her from spending a whole day at the computer centre. “Okay, I’m done too,” He said.

Christie walked out of the hall silently and he walked beside her, saying nothing. Occasionally Christie would glance at him and catch him watching her. He would look away quickly, the pimples on his face seeming more reddish each time he blushed. She decided to break the ice. “Which way are you going?”

He scratched his head and laughed nervously, “I’m not even sure. I just wanted to walk you back to your hostel.”

“I’m not even going to my hostel. I’m on my way to Abubakar Hall. I’m organizing a programme there tonight.”

“Then I’ll walk you there.”

Christie would have protested but she saw no harm in it so she let him walk her. The only problem she had with him was that he didn’t talk much. Christie had been called ‘radio-without-battery’ a good number of times and was yet to find someone who could match her in the number of words she spoke per minute. She had been told countless times that she would end up marrying someone quiet or else there would be trouble yet she just couldn’t stand dating a quiet guy talk less of marrying one. Thinking about dating, Christie knew she had to dismiss Frank soon. She didn’t like the way he was tailing her and something told her he was minutes away from gathering courage to ask her out.

Christie chuckled slightly as she remembered the last episode she had endured the night before. She had been walking to her hostel when she heard someone calling out to her, “Excuse me…excuse me,” the voice said. She had stopped abruptly and a short, stocky guy who had been hot on her heels bumped into her. “Yes?” Christie said, flippantly.

“Erm…erm…” He stammered.

“How can I help you?” Christie was about to walk away.

He suddenly grabbed her arm and said, “Shakespeare said, if music be the food of love, play on.”

Christie was too shocked to respond immediately and he took the cue to give a second one, “Aristotle said….” Christie burst into raucous laughter and quickly walked away. She couldn’t wait to tell her friends about the guy who must have rehearsed those ridiculous lines for hours, waiting for the girl that would fall for it.

She laughed softly under her breath and Frank asked her what amused her so. “Nothing much, I just remembered something that happened last night.” Christie shook her head slightly and giggled again. Then she realised that they were approaching the hall for the event. She knew she had to say something quickly and get rid of him. She was grateful for his help but she was already tired of his silence.

To be continued…

To Fan an Old Flame II

The second part you’ve been waiting for is finally here. If you missed the beginning part of To Fan an Old Flame then click here to read it.

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Continued from last edition.

Christie gasped in surprise as recognition flooded his face while her mind flashed back to that day 7 years ago when she had first met Frank.

It was on the first of October. Christie could still remember that day vividly. Firstly, because she had been appointed (it was more like she had volunteered) to organize an Independence Day celebration dinner for her fellowship that evening. The day had started with a flurry of activities and her to-do list still had thousands of un-ticked items awaiting her attention. Christie was good at organizing events and she in fact lived for it. It was one of the reasons why she had suggested that they should hold an event to commemorate the Independence Day in church wearing different shades of green and white. She had planned a grand event with notable guest speakers from other churches and popular music artistes. Perspiration beaded her forehead as she remembered yet another task she was yet to perfect in preparation for that evening. The flowers for the decoration were yet to be delivered. She dabbed at her forehead with her white handkerchief as she barked orders to her assistant to call the lady who was to deliver the flowers. Anybody watching her would think that Christie was under enormous pressure but on the contrary she was enjoying every bit of it. She was born to be in the limelight and being in charge of people gave her an extra burst of joy no one could understand.

The second reason why Christie would not forget that day in a hurry was what brought her in contact with Frank in the first place. She had been in the middle of supervising the seating arrangement when she suddenly remembered that she had an assignment to turn in the next day. The course was an elective course in computer application and the lecturer involved was very strict. The papers were to be submitted at 8 am the next day and it had been rumoured that the lecturer was known to use his assignments as tests so she knew she had to act fast. Christie quickly called Juliana, her immediate assistant for the purpose of organizing the dinner and asked her to hold forth while she rushed out to get something done.

Stopping by at her room in the three-storey hostel building, Christie picked up the notebook where she had written the questions and rushed to the University Cyber Cafe. It was in those days when computers were still novelty. Computer centres were few and people who had some form of expertise in the use of computers were even fewer. The big hall which housed about thirty computers was quite full and Christie was still contemplating whether to leave the place and find an alternative when someone stood up from his seat and she quickly took his place.

Christie looked behind her and saw the number of people that were still waiting for a chance to use a free system and felt very favoured. She smiled to herself and moved her cursor to click on the internet browser. At first, when the cursor didn’t move, she wiped her sweaty palms on her skirt, wondering why she felt that it would help in any way. Within the next few minutes of trying to move the mouse she realised that she may not have been very lucky to have gotten that free computer after all.

“Are you having problems with your computer?” Someone beside her asked. His voice had a soft, boyish tone and he was peeking at her from behind white-rimmed eye glasses. Christie nodded reluctantly, wondering what this boy with a face covered with reddish acne could do to help her.

To be continued…

Watch out for the next part of To Fan an Old Flame. You’re sure going to love it! 🙂

To fan an old flame

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As Christie walked briskly down the street that bright Monday morning, hurrying to her new office, she couldn’t help wondering if it was just her or if everybody was staring at her like they knew she was new in town. It didn’t help matters that she had to ask for direction each time she took a couple of steps. It was her first day at her new job and she didn’t want to miss a single turn and have to retrace her steps. That would cause a setback in her plans to arrive very early at the office.

Christie stood in front of the high rise building that housed the company she would soon call hers and took a deep breath. She wasn’t nervous, rather she was excited but taking a deep breath seemed like the natural thing to do before starting the first step into the rest of her working life. She took the elevator to the sixth floor as she had been told. When she came out of the elevator, she plastered a smile on her face and walked up to the security man at the door.

“Good morning, my name is Christie. I was asked to resume duties here as a Brand Marketing Associate. Can you please point me in the direction of the Human Resources Office? Thank you.” In three quick sentences she had introduced herself and what she was there for. Christie had often been told that she spoke as briskly as she walked but she couldn’t understand why people were slow to understand her and frankly couldn’t even think about slowing down her speech for anybody. The security man looked stunned as though the effort he had expended on trying to understand her articulate speech had completely worn him out. He simply motioned to her to walk in and pointed at a lady sitting behind the counter in the centre of the reception hall.

“Good morning,” Christie still had that cool, self-assured smile on her face.

“How may I help you?” The lady behind the counter adjusted the collar of her black suit and propped the receiver of an intercom between her right ear and shoulder and spoke into the mouth piece as she typed, still staring at the monitor of her computer.

“My name is Christie Eze, I was asked to resume duties today as….” Christie broke off her sentence as the lady pointed towards her right. Christie’s first instinct was to ask if there was a no-speaking policy in the firm. First it was the security man and now the receptionist. She wondered what the reaction of the next person she was to meet would be. “Excuse me, where did you say…” The lady pointed in the same direction again, more forcefully this time as if someone had just stepped on her toes and she continued speaking to the person on the other end of the line.

Christie hissed softly. She wasn’t about to let her good mood get dampened by any old lady with a bad work attitude. She walked in the direction the lady had pointed at and took a turn until the end of the corridor. Then she saw two doors on one side and one on the other side. On closer look, she saw that the two doors led to the elevators while the second door seemed like the door to an office. There was no need asking any further questions. Christie had already asked enough questions to last her a life time. She simply rapped twice on the door and stepped into the impressive office. There was a man standing behind the mahogany desk near the large windows overlooking a magnificent view of the city. The man was talking on the phone and looking down through the window.

Deciding it would be rude to interrupt, Christie stood patiently in front of the large desk, wondering where it must have been imported from because there was no way she would believe that something that perfect could have been made in Nigeria. There was also a set of settees made from fine leather on both sides. Everything in the office reeked of class and good taste. The man behind the desk chose that moment to turn around, while he was still talking on the phone, to see who had just walked into his office. Christie gasped in surprise as recognition flooded his face while her mind flashed back to that day 7 years ago when she had first met Frank.

To be continued….

Click here to read the rest of the story…

Part II, Part III, Part IV Part V