Please lie to me

photo credit - madmenoire.com

photo credit – madmenoire.com

Ladies, you know how it is naa. It is so easy to say, tell me the truth but…really? Is it the truth you want to hear or the garnished lie? Do you really want to hear that you’re not the beauty queen you think you are? Would you really rather hear the truth? Lol..now here’s the serious stuff.

A very good friend of mine once said to me, ‘A lie is a lie no matter what colour it comes in. There is nothing like a white lie or black lie. Every lie is a lie and a sin according to the holy book!’ Hmm I nodded in agreement but simply said to him, ‘please lie to me’.

Surprised as you are, he asked me why and so I elaborated. ‘Please lie to me sometimes…not all the time…especially when I ask you how I look’. Hahahaha…. now you know what I’m driving at. I remember seeing a very beautiful picture of two cute chicks (real chickens not babes, please) as a child. Written on it were the words, ‘No matter what, I like hearing the truth, ALWAYS’. It was such a beautiful picture and it’s message was so apt cos believe me, with the number of lies and deceit that occur in the world by the second I’m surprised the devil still has a job. I mean, I’m sure when the devil hears what comes out of some people’s mouths he goes like, ‘damn, even I couldn’t have thought of that.’ It was years later, having outgrown the childhood innocence and felt the cutting edge of some words from people I look up to that I realised that the truth may not always be so desirable. I sometimes wanted to say, ‘I know you don’t want to tell a white lie but please can u make it a little grey?’

But seriously, I have seen people who cut your heart open in the name of being honest. Some say, ‘I can’t help being honest with you, it’s just my nature’. Really? I can’t remember any law that says u must say everything you think about. I mean, do you really have to keep telling me that I look fatter each time you see me? I have a mirror, you know? Do you have to tell me that the hair I spent money to do including the pain I endured, is awful? Do you really think it is nice to tell me that the meal I spent my time and energy to make is terrible? I mean don’t you think maybe you could find a better way to relay it? Before you speak, could you just stop for a minute and consider a better way to say something that is hurtful? Instead of saying, ‘that’s a dreadful hairstyle! You could say, ‘that hairstyle is not so flattering on you’. More importantly, it’s not enough to only criticize, you should balance it by suggesting ways to make it better. 

I’m not saying you should start telling lies oh! Just remember that the world could definitely do with some extra sensitivity.  We often forget that you can cut or heal with your words. Some say hurtful things to you just to make themselves feel better but sorry, it doesn’t work that way. Putting somebody’s candle off cannot light yours. Spoiling someone’s day cannot make yours better, rather kind words can put a smile on someone’s face and in return, that smile could make your day. So again I say, please lie to me.

Femmetotale…

 

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2 thoughts on “Please lie to me

  1. Neniegirl says:

    I once read that we need to earn the right to criticize. That means we should sandwich hurtful comments if we must make them, btw words of praise. Rather than on d spur of the moment, we could pause to think of d kindest way of saying it. Also, timing is crucial. Someone said 90% of conflict is from insisting on our preferences. That u prefer less salt does not mean my soup is terrible! Let us be kind to one another.

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